Some deal with loneliness better than others. I revel in solitude; I enjoy it, and a quiet corner where I can read, write, study, and pray is all I really need in order to make me happy or satisfied. I’m not what some might call a social butterfly. I don’t go out of my way to be among other people, and depending on my state of mind and the things that need to get done on a given day, it’s more likely than not that being by my lonesome is preferable. The only exceptions to this generality are my wife and daughters, whom I love spending time with, whether it’s just sitting around the dinner table and reading the Word or playing my oldest daughter’s most recent obsession, Clue.
Each of us deals with being alone differently, and for some
people, the worst possible thing they could think of is being alone with their
thoughts, with no one to talk to and no one to socialize with.
It’s in those moments of quiet and solitude that some of the
most profound insights regarding the Word, the character of God, and the wisdom
of the Bible come to the fore, and were I the only one to insist upon it, you
could wave it off as anecdotal. Going back as far as Paul the apostle, however,
we see that some of the deepest truths he penned were done so from inside a
prison cell. We know from his writings, as well as historical context, that he
wrote his letters to the Ephesians, the Colossians, the Philippians, and
Philemon from prison and that they are some of the most liberating words he
ever put to parchment.
In conversation with those who were incarcerated and
persecuted for the name of Christ, whether they were songwriters, preachers,
teachers of the word, or authors, the running theme has been that their most
substantive and insightful body of work took place when they were in solitary
confinement, in prison, or suffering at the hands of those who would see the
name Jesus expunged from the lips of all in their generation. God is near to
those who are near to Him, and in their seasons of hardship and trial, He is an
ever-present refuge.
Embrace solitude. Make time daily to be alone with God and
tune out all the noise. Do it consistently, and you will see the growth in
intimacy you have with God for yourself. Allowing oneself to be distracted
constantly is one of the quickest ways to watch the fire of your once-burning
love turn to embers. As the adage goes, out of sight, out of mind, and if the
enemy can keep us from pressing in and growing in God if he can distract us
from being in His presence, he might not have won the war, but he’s winning the
battle for our attention. What we do consistently over time will become
habitual, a common practice without which we feel incomplete on a given day.
When we begin our day with God, being in His presence, and reading
His word daily for a prolonged period, the day we fail to do it, we realize
something is amiss even if we didn’t consciously set out to bypass that alone
time. Most men are creatures of habit, and your habits will determine whether
you’re drawing closer to God or slipping further away from Him.
It’s different when you’re suffering, bedridden, or going
through something so emotionally vexing as to curse the day you were born,
however. That’s when you hunger for the presence of another to be there with
you, for you, hopefully taking a bit of the weight off your back and being a
shoulder to cry on.
The beauty of knowing Christ and walking with Him is that
even when we are alone, we are not alone. He is a forever friend, forever
confidant, forever faithful and present, the one we could reach out to knowing
He will be there, and an ever-present comfort and balm. There’s a reason
Christians don’t go to therapy, and it’s not because they’re too rigid or don’t
think that it’s an actual thing, although, let’s be fair, some of the worst
advice I’ve heard came from people with degrees in psychology, but because they
always have someone to confide in, someone at whose feet they can lay their
burdens down.
When you’re given a choice between the peace of God, which
surpasses all understanding, and a scruffy-looking guy in a tweed jacket whose
own life is a steaming mess talking about triggers and repressed memories, it’s
no choice at all. Everyone’s in therapy nowadays, but nobody seems to be
getting any better. They’re medicated to the gills just to get through an ordinary
day, one little pill to make them happy, another to make them sad, and another
to balance them out, never coming to the realization that until they deal with
the root cause of their malaise, they will not improve. It’s the absence of His
presence that’s making them feel as though their lives are in a tailspin when
they’re likely living better than the top one percent of the top one percent in
the world.
When men reject Christ and all that He offers, they try to
find ways and means to counterfeit the peace and joy only He can bring. They hoard
things, seek admiration, obsess over careers, or run to men, hoping they can
fix what only God can because their hearts are hard and darkened, and rather
than humble themselves and come to the foot of the cross in repentance, they’ll
talk themselves into believing that nothing so simple as surrender and obedience
can be the balm or cure for the maelstrom of their hearts.
Until his friends showed up, Job was alone, with the brief respite of his wife insisting that he relinquish the integrity he held onto, curse God, and put an end to the pain. Even at his lowest, God was still present and had Job doubted God’s love for him; he would have likely succumbed to the overwhelming fear of desperation.
With love in Christ,
Michael Boldea, Jr.
Posted on 29 November 2024 | 12:03 pm
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